As every regular reader (Hi mom!) of my Roundup column knows, robot recruiters are coming.
Tech junkies already know that in all the bigger shops in the free world robots do most of the heavy recruitment lifting. We call these robots ATS or talent acquisition technology, but they’re bots.
What I’m talking about here are the other kind of bots, the ones like the lovable WALL-E or C-3PO. These are the ones on their way into HR offices of the not-too-far-off future. Every week these bots get smarter and more recruiter-like. (More than a few pissed-off candidates have responded to bot-generated messages in language that would get this Roundup an “R” rating.)
But now comes the final touch to making the perfect recruiting robot. Engineers at University of the West of England in the United Kingdom have developed a way to power robots using urine.
The possibilities here are endless. Instead of getting annoyed with a candidate who gets pissy, our robot recruiter might appreciate such behavior, especially when their energy level drops. Flushing the old apps out of the system would be more literal than figurative. And being pissed at a recruiter would have a whole new meaning.
You there rolling your eyes. Don’t think I didn’t see that. I know your type. You’re the person who always says things like, “Yes, but” or “Let’s be realistic” when someone comes up with something a little different.
What would you say to a suggestion that we’re having such a great year we should give everyone in the company $500? “It’s too expensive!” or maybe “GET REAL.” I suggest you read, memorize, and print out this list of idea killers before you say anything more.
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Lucky for the employees of Griffin Communications that none of the owners said anything of the spoil sport sort when the bonus idea got kicked around by David, Kirsten, and John Griffin. To thank the employees of the various TV stations owned by the company, the Griffins handed out $500 to each person on the payroll. It was recognition, the VP of marketing was quoted explaining, “for their hard work, dedication, and passion over the last five years and to celebrate where the company is at this moment — doing very, very well.”